Just Some of My Thoughts…. Return to Love

Return to Love…

Just Some of My Thoughts... Fedora Loves Poetry 2018I have been quiet for a while because Fedora has been on her journey. Her journey of growth and freedom. I have learned much about myself and how loving myself before others helps to maintain your personal freedom. It becomes a part of you that no one can take.

A select few may be able to touch her there but cannot take HER away. To maintain a healthy love relationship, you must include time for self. Giving all of ourselves in any relationship depletes your soul. Self is your soul, your inner man, your third eye. If you deplete it, you begin to die. Love begins within self. A healthy love for self will allow you to love another in a healthy way.

Infinite Love Intertwines the Souls by FedoraI have returned to love after working on self. I am loving HIM again. It has brought out some wounds. I know that you want me to tell you that love in its self is perfect. But it is not, love has a negative side as well that allows pain. If you love another within your heart and soul, you will experience pain. Yours and theirs because you are infinitely connected, like the infinity symbol.

But this time I am facing what is being seen and accepted. Growing in love means being able to stand in the mirror. To understand that to get the best of someone’s heart and soul requires giving the best of self.  This requires that you face things when they show up, do not excuse the behavior, accept the truth about why it exists, and then release it.

Once you release it, do not pick it back up. It’s done. Learn how to grow from it not be stuck in it. You don’t want to be self-rooted in anything that will keep you from growing. As long as you can see your growth, your know you are living. When you are glowing and growing, then you know you are loving.

Returning to love has been scary for me, but it is showing me my true self. It shows me that I am tough, I am soft, I am peace, I am fire, I am confident, I am fearful, and I am grounded spiritually. I can finally use what I have learned to love openly, wisely and truly.

Fedora Loves You. Fedora Loves Poetry

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River Lover

You pour love inside me
Sharing your seeds of life
With our energy

Giving all the spirit
Has to bestow
In purity

Your love transcends
So many layers
Barriers erected by the world

Your life force is pure
Powerful and forceful
It seeks out purpose

It seeks to revive
All that has grown cold
Your heart melts the caps

Releasing the flow
Of raging waters
Into the

Gentle breeze of
My calm stream
We connect

Allowing the waters
To freely bind us as
One long-flowing river

River of life
River of love
River of spirit

Just some of my thoughts on…. Messy Love

Messy love…

Just Some of My Thoughts... Fedora Loves Poetry 2018Love is never uncomplicated for me. Why? I don’t know. I encountered a song by Corinne Bailey Rae “Till It Happens to You”. Damn wish someone would have told me. Told me how messy love takes away the color of love.

Passion burns hot through our love. We will always have the red heat between us. But due to division in our love only a stripe represents what used to cover the entire heart. The gray covers most of our picture because hearts have been hurt. As I see my friends in similar messy relationships, I begin to wonder has the become the new thing?

What happened to truth? What happened to respect? I can remember times when people may have been in messy relationships, but they respected each other. Respect is now a dirty word as I watch people using innocent children to keep someone close to them. How people use those who love them as pawns in a chess game. What happened to respect? What happened to integrity?

Wait am I fooling myself.

Messy love paints stripes on your heart. The red stripe of passion that comes and goes. The gold stripe of what will be if you ever get there. The gray stripes take up most of the heart because this is where the truth lives. The reality of the love. The pain of the love. The gratitude of the love. The compromise. The purpose for all this is here as well.

But there are times when the purpose gets buried so deep that I forget. I forget that there was a really good reason and purpose for our connection, our love, for each other. But when those moments hit, the real ugly truth of the messiness. I lose a little bit and the color fades a little more. But the shininess of the gold stripe keeps me when he says, “Hey Beautiful”, along with the heat of the passion as he expresses his true adoration of me. That makes it hard to stay in the gray.

So, despite the messiness of this love. I still find the desire to open my heart each time he is near me. To love regardless of what I get back. To love on purpose. Purpose may or may not return to you. So, if you don’t have a good reason (purpose) for loving and staying, then they gray may take over. Allow purpose to be your foundation for love.

Till It Happens To You by Corinne Bailey Rae

Wish someone would have told me!Fedora Loves You. Fedora Loves Poetry

 

 

 

Fedora Loves You. Peace

 


[Verse 1]
I know what I said was heat
Of the moment
But, there’s a little truth in
Between the words we’ve spoken
It’s a little late now to fix a heart
That’s broken
Please don’t ask me where I’m going

[Chorus]
Cause I don’t know, no I don’t know
Anymore
It used feel like heaven, it used feel like
May, I used to hear those violins playing
Harp strings like a symphony
Now they’ve gone away
Nobody wants to face the truth
But, you won’t believe what love can do
Till it happens to you
Till it happens to you

[Verse 2]
Went to the old flat
Guess I was trying to turn the clock back
But, how come that nothing feels the same now
When I’m with you?
We used to stay up all night in the kitchen when
Our love was new
Ooh love am I a fool to believe in you

[Chorus 2]
Cause I don’t know, no I don’t know anymore
It used feel like heaven, it used feel like may
I used hear those violins playing harp strings
Like a symphony now there gone away
Nobody wants to know the truth until their
Hearts broken
Don’t you dare tell them what you think to do
Until they get over, you can only learn these things
From experience when you get older
I just wish that someone would’ve told me
Till it happens to you
Till it happens to you
Till it happens to you

“Good Love” by 11:11


Do I ever cross your mind?
Even though I crossed the line?
Do you ever think ’bout me?

Yeah, I know we had good times
Baby, I was dumb and blind
To open my eyes and see…
Ooh yeah

There was good love, waiting for me
Too much, time and energy
On someone, that ain’t you
Ooh woah

There was good love, waiting for me
Too much, time and energy
On someone, that ain’t you
Woah

Do I ever cross your mind? (Cross your mind?)
Do you ever think ’bout me? (’bout me baby)

Yeah, I know we had good times (good times)
Dumb and blind (dumb and blind)
I just want only you lovin’ me
Ooh yeah, yeah

I just want that good love
Good love, baby
Good love, with you
I want it darling, you know I need it

I just want that good love
Good love, baby
Good love, with you

Igniting the fire of Love to heal thy heart.

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