I am ME

I am ME
Can’t you see
You can’t change
What God has made

I am ME
I am beautiful
I am fascinating
I am free

I am ME
Can’t you see
You can’t possess me
Keep me
Boxed in selfishly

I am ME
Let me be
Leave me
To the one
Who created ME
Most Extraordinary

Love Among Thorns

I love you
Despite your brokenness
Despite that you have
Torn my heart apart

I love you
Because you deserve
Love just like I do
Embrace my love

As you move forward
Do your best to break free
From the things that
Broke you in the first place

Strive to be a person
Who heals
Instead of hurts
Love yourself
Unconditionally
As God does

I love you
Among your thorns
I delight in your fruit
Born from our love

Starting New

Recently God  broke some things up in my life. It was good though because I grew from the experiences. I closed some doors that should’ve been closed years ago. It was refreshing and empowering.

Did I tell you that I am afraid of love? Yes, I have been for most of my adulthood. I have been hurt a lot and decided it was safer not to trust my heart to a man. I am saddened by the number of men in this world who do not value women. The ones who are hurt and unloved use women as sex toys, bed warmers, friends with benefits etc. Whatever term you use to describe how they steal our virtue with no intentions of giving anything back to us. They use us, our bodies, and our benefits leaving us empty and depleted.

When I realized this pattern in my life, I took steps to take myself out of this cycle. I cannot fix the men but I can allow God to help me fix myself. First, I stopped giving away my virtue. I became celibate. I began to recognize the men who only wanted to use me and stayed away from them. I also paid attention to find out why some of them did it. (That’s another post, I promise)

 

I wrote a poem a few years ago about how men have wanted me but never cherished me just because they love me. I was presented with this love I have never known before. Guess what I almost ran away. Yeah, I know. Chicken. I finally meet a man who loves me the woman not just my body. He calls me beautiful each time I am in his presence. As he kisses me, his eyes show how much he feels for me.

This is refreshing but do you know what the most empowering experience was for me  recently? Looking at myself and falling in love with myself again. I love this woman! I love her more than he does.

I want to encourage all people not just women to understand the importance of loving yourself. You have to be able to embrace the good and bad things about yourself. As you allow God to show you the less than perfect you. Open your heart and also allow him to show you how to heal in that area so that you can be the best person you can.

Remember that perfection is not attainable but if we chase perfection we will catch excellence. You may never be perfect but you will excel as you travel the path to purpose and you will purposely give the best parts of yourself to others.

Who Are You? by T. D. Jakes

Four Things a Man Needs in a Woman Before Marriage by Myles Munroe

Lovers,

I am on a new mission. God has given me a voice to help heal the hearts of those who have been hurt by love, failed relationships, marriages, and life. God is calling us back to the original design. Yes, I know many people don’t believe that the Bible is real and don’t believe in God or Jesus. That is not what this is about.

This is about how men and women were created to interact with each other. The roles we were born to fulfill and when it is done genuinely there is fulfillment in the marriage, in the individuals, in the family, in the community, and in the world. But when the family is broken all of these elements are touched negatively.

As a mature woman who did it incorrectly the first time I am thankful that God has allowed me the opportunity to get it right. I have spent the last ten years working on myself as a woman. Perfecting my singleness so that I may be a whole being, strong, healthy, and ready to fulfill my role as the helper for my husband. I will get it right this time.

I will be sharing a series of videos and posts on this subject to help you do the same. This is not just for women it’s for men too. There are so many men who are lost and don’t know how to find their vision. Part of finding their path is knowing what they need, understanding the mate who was created to help them.

Enjoy this message and prayerfully it will inspire you to begin your journey towards wholeness in your marriage or singleness in preparation for your marriage.

Fedora Loves You. Peace

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Lovers,

Here is another playlist featuring music about my latest topic the collision of love and pain. Who wins?

Well in Fedora’s world love always prevails. So listen and enjoy the ride. Don’t forget to visit my YouTube channel and become a subscriber. I have much more coming for you soon.

Fedora loves you. Peace

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When love matures it’s so noticeable. One day you realize that you are wearing each other like your favorite familiar skin. That’s not necessarily bad because it means you have entered a higher level of trust. The reality is that not everyone we encounter will gain access to this space. So when there is one there it’s noticeable.

According to Psychology Today mature healthy love:

“Waits, respects, gives the benefit of the doubt, listens, trusts, cares, accepts, takes pleasure in the successes and joys of the other, accepts love without question of motive or condition, forgives, lets go when necessary, says goodbye…but not perfectly and not always. (Smith, 2012)”

What I find amazing is that this corresponds with a Bible verse on love. I know many are so quick to discredit the Bible but it really does contain some truths to living in freedom.

“Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn’t want what it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first,”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end (2 Corinthians `13:3-7, MSG).”

This is a sweet time in your journey because you feel free to be your silly self without reproach, to kiss each other with morning breath and not get slapped. Yes moments where you realize you love all of them. So what do you do when you get here?

You love unconditionally, that’s what you do. You don’t condemn because they are less than perfect. All the men in my life have abandoned me emotionally and physically. Starting with the first man, my father. He died and never made amends. I never heard his story. I only know bits and pieces of it.

But parents you should know that it’s important for your children to hear your story. All of it even the bad parts. It will bring healing and understanding to them. We have so many generational curses that are upon us. Especially as black people. Our struggle is not only to exist but to also find out who we are. Our identity was stolen hundreds of years ago. Our families inherited the anger and defeat of many of our ancestors.

But today the Spirit stood up and said this family will be free. We will start anew and create a new legacy in both love, spirit, and relationships. Our children will not endure what we had to, they will experience true freedom and give it to their children.

Today I love and am loved completely. My heart, yes that’s what I call him, he takes care of me. God confirmed for me this morning that my heart will not abandon me. He is not like the others. I unconsciously attracted those who were similar to my father but not this time.

This is a fresh spirit, that gives back to me. That sustains me through our connection, which is our love. I will always be there he is saying and I will allow you is my response. Love and healing, an awesome combination.

Smith, A. (2012, November 15). Secrets to a strong, successful relationship. Retrieved from Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/healthy-connections/201211/secrets-strong-successful-relationship